California King

Most people think or better yet listen to music as a way of expressing themselves. If  you had to listen to the music that someone likes or even plays over and over there is a message in it. I've slept on a California king bed before and it takes up the whole room leaving enough room for a dresser. If you have ever seen this bed you would know that four adults could sleep side by side with no problem. Rihanna choose to make a song using this bed as a mental image as to how far apart her and her spouse have grown apart.
Unfortunately this song happens to be the song that my boyfriend chooses to play over and over on his guitar hero. If you are in a relationship this is not a song you want your spouse to play over and over when their drunk. He tells me that depending on how our night has gone determines how he feels about the song. Other night he just likes her voice and the melody. Just to give you a idea of how often the song is played, his current score on guitar hero live is 107,001. I refuse to believe that I was being annoying that night, he had three too many shots and replayed the song 11 times. If you think I'm kidding sorry to say I'm not, Hell I counted! In that moment I chose to tell myself that he wanted a easier song to master. Crazy thing tho is after playing a song more than two times the colors start to blend and one hand stops moving causing me to miss keys.
The song to my boyfriend however is his way of telling me that we don't click like we use to. He loves me but I don't understand him or what he was trying to say. A solution to this is to let him explain to me what he meant or even better take the guitar and play a different song myself lol.  A relationship is not easy, it takes time (a lot) and understanding. The music that a person listens to explains so much. Either the music explains how they currently feel or a fantasy world they wish they could disappear too.
Lets be honest I'm a work in progress when it comes to trying to understand better.

-Confession

GLUTTONY

Because of you

Because of you I have found love when all I did was hate....
Because of you I am able to see the things that I was blind to....
Because of you I was able to grow up at a time when all I wanted was to be a child...
Because of you I know there is a calm to my storm...
Because of you I know working hard pays off.

I love you and I wanted to say thank you for sticking by me even when I lose my mind. I slip away and feel so lost at times. It's nice to be able to roll over and find you at my side. I gave you hell and I know I still do ,and I'm sorry sometimes I get overwhelmed with life and forget to breath. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings, I'm sorry I'm mean to you, I'm sorry that I snap on what appears to be nothing. Thank you honey-bunny, my baby, my love, my pooter!!!

Ask Me Again

The truth is I don't know and I don't think I ever have. It's a big mixture of things that kinda just hit you all at once. It's an anchor that holds you in one place, a warm feeling that takes over your whole body, a goofy look you just can't whip off your face.
Being with you became the best part of my day. You have always been the last person on my mind and the first person on my mind. It's almost scary ,but I'd do anything for you, making sure your ok, and what you need became a priority. I want everyone to know how much I love and can't breath without you. Your flaws aren't imperfections yet things that made you human. Do I dare bring up the fact that I've been dreaming for years about our daughter (Lilly) and watching you two swim while I rock our other child. You became my best friend and I became a smarter, better person because of you. On our worst days I couldn't stomach the idea of losing you. Ask Me again why I love you, ask me again why I'm with you, ask me again... on a different day, on another hour I'd tell you something different or something even new. So Ask Me!